And The Journey Continues...

Hi friends Mom! It's day 1 of my 4 day weekend and gosh can I say I love working a summer schedule! 5 hours a day 4 days a week is such a reward from the 50-60 hour weeks I put in during the school year. Yesterday I even got kicked out of my office an hour early because our carpets were going to be cleaned. School schedules rock! (Remind me of that come September!)

This week has been a decent week for food intake & exercise. I missed 1 day this week of the gym and surprisingly, I was really upset about it. I felt so ashamed of not going and was frustrated with myself. I also overate a couple of days and am having trouble quelling my sweet tooth but I've only been over calories 1 day with the rest remaining within my limit or limit + exercise range. I can tell I feel so much better when I exercise and have kicked butt in the gym this week. Even though I still need to go to bed earlier, I have more energy.

One thing I am learning through this process is that every day brings a fresh start, a clean slate. If I happen to not do so great one day, it doesn't mean I'm a complete failure or that I am forever doomed. Even if I feel that way. It just means that I have to get back on track and make a more concentrated effort the next day. I think that's why I haven't succeeded in the past-because I would have 1 bad day of food choices or not working out and I would throw in the proverbial towel. But MFP really helps with that as well in that every morning I start out with 1500 calories. What I do with those is up to me, especially if I use them wisely and add to them through exercise or if I waste them on a temporary fix. I'm learning that beating myself up obviously hasn't worked so now it's time to be real and focus on one step, one choice at a time.

With our trip to NC 2 weeks away (YAY!), I'm doing some prep work in researching some exercises I can do since we won't be in a gym for at least 10 days. The good thing is that my parents have a treadmill and lucky for me, walking/jogging are things I can do outside if necessary (even in summer heat). I'm also checking out strength training and other exercises that will keep me on track while we are gone. We'll be at family reunions (w/huge meals) for 2 days and I'm already prepping for that-a spoonful of the things I want, not a plateful-and then we head to the beach for a few days. That part I can't wait for! We'll be going to the same beach where Z & I honeymooned and I'm looking forward to having some rest and spending some QT with my parents as well. Visits with friends as well as a surprise for Z will cap off the week and I can't wait. I only wish we had more time overall but 10 days is pretty darn good for a vacay. Can you tell I'm excited???

Guess I've gone on enough for now and Z & I have to leave soon for dinner/swimming with friends so...Sayonara for now!

***BAP News Update***

Wow...I think this is the longest stint I've been without writing in a LONG time-and I can tell. For me, this is more than just a blog. It is a safe haven, a place where I can unload and unwind and share my thoughts, feelings, and opinions. Writing is my stress reliever just like coloring is used to be when I was younger. And since it's been so long, I have no idea where to start...

How about with my and Z's trip to NC? While we were there we...
~met w/the event planner at the conference center where we're getting married and got LOTS of ?s answered.
~met with a baker who makes AMAZING cakes and decided on ours (I got to design it myself-yay!). (And since I am addicted to cake, you KNOW it will be delish!)
~ate at Zaxby's.
~met my older bro for lunch.
~ate at Moe's for Z's 1st meal there.
~attended a wedding rehearsal.
~attended the rehearsal dinner in my hometown where we gave Z the 30 minute highlight t0ur which translates to "we showed him the whole town since it only takes 30 minutes for the grand tour".
~attended the wedding of one of my best friends in the world.
~ordered my wedding dress. *BIG smiles* :)
~made a quick stop at Hobby Lobby w/my parents.
~had Cinnabons TWICE.
~spent a lot of quality time w/my parents which I desperately needed.
~stayed up too late and got up too early for too many nights.

And upon our return we had a quick meal with his parents and arrived back in Tyler at 2am-on Daylight Savings Time weekend. Talk about not a fun Sunday. Those kids at Youth Bible Study got the Mr. Hyde of my personality that morning even though I tried to be as nice as possible. I slept so hard during my Sunday afternoon nap that I don't think I actually woke back up until about 1/2 way through our evening church service. But afterward, we took the kids bowling and ended up having a great time. As of today, my body still hasn't figured out the whole jet lag/daylight savings time so I'm still staying up WAY too late.

Work is getting increasingly harder-not in difficulty but because I desperately need to move. There is barely enough work for 1 person (and certainly not full-time at that) so to have 2 of us is really uncalled for. So I'm back to an interview blitz on Friday and am determined to find a job if it kills me. I am so beyond ready to be moved and living the next stage of my life-with Z, with the church, in a bigger town, establishing myself. I'm praying for God to do a quick work and am believing for Him to be faithful as He always is.

Wedding planning is coming along really well. As I mentioned before, my dress is ordered and we have a cake and have confirmed the location for the ceremony and reception. At first, there weren't any room available in the hotel at the center and so our guests were going to have to stay in other locations on the campus. But we got good news that the group that had reserved 96 rooms in the hotel had cancelled so there were now plenty of rooms for our event. This is wonderful not only so our guests can have really nice accommodations but also because the hotel is connected to the reception location (a brand new conference building). I am so excited about everything coming together. We've requested pricing for our menu so we'll see what can stay and what must go but I'm extremely excited about all of it! And I must thank my parents for being so supportive and standing behind me through all of this. They have truly shown 100% support of everything and I will be forever indebted to them (though I already am).

This post really wouldn't be complete without mentioning a very special person who has been the 1 factor of stability in my life for the past 8 months. Z, thank you for being my other half. Even though I am a complete person, you only enhance me and make me want to be better. I could never thank you enough for your devotion and support. You are my one true love, the only person who truly "gets" me and continues to put up with me. My gratitude is eternal and my love will last even longer. 'Thank you' could never begin to repay you for all you've done for me. I look forward with excitement to growing old with you by my side and hope you are always certain of my forever love for you. You are the other half of our 'Dynamic Duo', the man who I respect, admire and have given my heart to for all of eternity. Tu eres mi corazon y te amo siempre.

Blessings to you all!
~B
From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another. John 1:16

Now, where was I?

It's been a wild 10 days. I've been to NC and back which means I've been to Dallas and back. It was a busy trip-or at least it felt that way. Here's how the past week and a half have gone in my world.

*Monday, 12/22/08
Had a good, busy day at work and left immediately after to go to DFW to see Z. Arrived safely and celebrated Christmas with him and his family. Went out to dinner at BJ's-a great pizza/sports bar in Arlington. They have the BEST pizza! Headed back to his house and did a photo shoot with him and his siblings. They are so fun! Had some of the Coldstone ice cream he got me and then hit the sheets.

*Tuesday, 12/23/08
Left DFW east bound and arrived in the Tarheel state at noon. The airport and traffic were total chaos but I ended up sitting next to a guy my age from Tyler so he filled me in on the events and attractions of my future home. Upon arrival, after a quick stop at Panera for a baker's dozen of their Cinnamon Crunch bagels (which is becoming a tradition), we headed home. Both brothers & sis-in-law had already arrived and Grandma had been there for a week. Was super tired from getting up so early & traveling so managed a short nap after lunch. Then headed out for some last minute shopping with the whole fam minus Gma & Dad. Never want to do that again. Came home, had pizza for dinner then opened presents with older bro & SIL as they were heading to her parents' house the next day. Got some great stuff, all from my list so that was good. Fell asleep on the couch with bros watching tv and chatting around 1am.

*Wednesday, 12/24/08 CHRISTMAS EVE
Got up late at 7:30 since I was supposed to pick Dad up from a minor medical procedure at 8am. Headed to get him & we had some father/daughter time. Ate breakfast & shopped for a bit then headed home. Hung out for a while until bro & SIL left and then went out last minute shopping AGAIN w/mom and little bro. Not so fun but really not as bad as I expected. Finished up then headed to Christmas Eve service at church where I sang a couple songs. It was a good service. Came home, ate dinner and just hung out until bedtime.

*Thursday, 12/25/08 CHRISTMAS DAY
Woke up around 9:30 and just sat for a while with mom til others started to wake up. Watched tv and ate breakfast then just enjoyed laying around in my pj's. Finally got a shower and we opened presents around 2. It was a good Christmas-I got all I asked for and more and the time spent with family was priceless. Stayed up watching tv & hanging around the house after bro & his gf left around 9.

*Friday, 12/26/08
I like to refer to this day as the "Post-Christmas Crash"-the day when everyone realizes the Big Day is over and 'real life' has begun it's trek back. Just did a little shopping with Mom, Gma & Dad & ate the BEST Mexican food EVER. Although, I think that's probably just because I've had to eat Tex-Mex for the past 16 months. I LOVE real Mexican though and I think it's because I LOVE white cheese sauce. I've seriously considered buying some from Moe's and bringing it home and probably will soon. So after great Mexican, we headed home to relax and enjoy the evening.

*Saturday, 12/27/08
The Post-Christmas Crash is in full swing but Mom and I ventured out early for a little Christmas surprise-manicures at Dashing Diva. We had a good time together and I really enjoyed just being with her. She's a lot of fun and I really enjoy her company. After lunch at home, we went out shopping for a bit and then went home and I went back out with Dad. Had a touch of the holiday letdown and stayed up way too late.

*Sunday, 12/28/08
Church time came early but it was a good service and lunch was grand-I finally got chicken & hashbrowns. Mix that with broccoli cornbread, leftover sweet potatoes and butter beans and that's a feast folks. Spent the afternoon napping and watched "The Notebook" with the fam that night. Packed, did a little laundry, and hit the sheets in preparation for my travel back.

*Monday, 12/29/08
Left around 9:30 headed back to the airport with a bag that weighed well over 50 lbs. Upon arrival, I found that it would cost $65.00 to get that 57 lb. bag back to TX so I unpacked a few items into my carry-ons and made it at 50 lbs even. Stood in the security line for 30 minutes and was finally in and ready to board. Perused the bustling airport for a bit and then made my way to my gate. We boarded and loaded on time and headed out. I slept most of the way and was picked up by my wonderful fiance in Dallas. (As you can tell, the flight back was a bit less thrilling than the flight there-as it usually is.) Back at his house, we enjoyed being together and had a great dinner of burgers and hot dogs that his dad had grilled. I made it back home at 11:30pm and unloaded, unpacked and hit the sheets. It was an excellent end to a wonderful Christmas vacation.

So that's the roundup of the holiday season for my little life. I'll do a 2008 finale and 2009 projection in the next couple days as I have time. I'll be traveling quite a bit but really want to get some writing in as well. The new year is bringing lots of change to my Pearce party of 1 but good times are coming!

For now, have a happy and safe New Year's Eve and a joyous celebration of the new beginning! Blessings to you all!

~B
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17

'Tis The Season

Well, a day week late and a (couple hundred) dollars short-thanks Mom & Dad, I'm back in TX. When I last wrote, I was preparing for a long trip home to NC to celebrate Thanksgiving with my fam.Over the past 10 days I have done the following:

*Traveled over 2,000 miles
*Been on the road approx. 40 hours
*Driven or ridden through 4 states 2x each
*Told my parents that Z & I are engaged. Yes, you read that right-more details later.
*Eaten 4,962,185 calories. That could be a slight exaggeration.
*Lost 20 hours of sleep. That could also be a slight exaggeration.
*Written 0 blogs. Hence this one.
*Redecorated my blog, twitter & facebook sites for Christmas
*Decided to not decorate my house for Christmas at all. The time I'm going to be at home does not justify the hassle.
*Booked all my weekends for December
*Bought 0 Christmas gifts. That's right, nothing, nada, zilch. Can we say PANIC?!?!?!
*Exercised 0 hours. Fatty McRoll girl is back. Yuck.
*Contracted & successfully gotten over a head cold WITHOUT going to the doctor. And only once did I comment that I wanted to cut my head off to make everything better. The number of times I complained about not being able to breathe? I'm not telling.
*Laughed with my brothers 842,916 times. Withk it like thith. Mmmkay little boys? Do you want any candy???
*Officially received my TX driver's license (that saga to follow as well)
*Gone shopping 1 time. That's a record, folks.
*Forgotten about technology 492 times and even went 2 whole days without indulging into the e-world.
*Done a LOT of thinking and praying about my life and future
*Learned a new job at work
*Ended a close friendship. Ouch. That is a definite understatement.
*Thought a LOT about how to give creative Christmas gifts this year.
*Spent 11 consecutive days with Z. And am still madly in love with him. :)
*Decided that I am far too blessed for what I deserve. Thanks God-You're amazing!

And with that, this post is over. Finito. Finished. Check back later for more details on several items in the above list.

Blessings,
B
Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men. Psalm 107:31

I'm leavin' on a jet plane...

(but sorry Peter, Paul & Mary-and John Denver-I do indeed know when I'll be back again.)

In honor of my impending vacation, I've decided to bring in special guest, List Format, to help me share with you why I am SOOO excited about the next 7 days. Mr. Format, you may begin...

TOP 10 REASONS WHY BETHANY IS EXCITED ABOUT VACATION

1. BYE BYE
I am LEAVING PARIS! As much as I have grown to love this town, it gets old seeing the same old things, day after day.

2. FRIEND
I am vacationing with my bestie, Ash. We ALWAYS have fun together and there will definitely be many good memories made on this trip! Plus, I can't wait to see how many people ask us if we're twins or sisters. This will be fun!

3. MEMORIES
Ash has never flown before so this will definitely be a learning experience for her. I can't wait to hear what she has to say about all the proceedings of the flight. Especially since I've researched the TSA website and provided her with as much information as possible to make her first flight enjoyable including "What are you wearing on the plane?" and "What is it exactly that I can't have in my purse?". I'm loving it!

4. Z
This evening, I'll get to spend some time with Z as I'm staying with him and his family tonight and he'll be taking me to the airport in the morning. He was sweet enough to offer to do this for me so that we could avoid parking fees and is even getting up before God does on Saturdays to deliver me to my flight. (It really works well for him to live so close to the airport-now I have every reason to go down the night before a flight to see him and we can do the whole mushy airport goodbye thing. Just kidding. Kinda.)

~As a side note, have I mentioned that he and I are "in a relationship" (to use Facebook/MySpace terms)? I spent Friday night and Saturday with him last weekend and we had the DTR (define the relationship) talk and decided that we want to try to pursue this. The distance situation is not ideal but it is what it is and we're making the best of it. The best way I know how to explain it is this: When in a relationship, there are multiple levels on which there is potential for one to connect with another person. For me these levels include physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and humorful-even though that's not the word, I can't find the one I'm looking for. (I know there are more but these are the most prominent and important to me.) In the past, I have connected with the guys I've dated on varying levels. All of them shared a connection with me on the physical level as there is usually a visual trait that originally attracts me to them and vice versa. However, I may connect with one physically and emotionally and another may strike me physically and with his sense of humor. Until Z, I had yet to meet a man whom I connected with on every level. But I do with him. He just "gets" me-for lack of a better term. He can almost read my mind at times which is scary or we'll jointly say the exact same thing. And the way he fills silences in conversations with "yeah", "well", and "aaanywaaay" is absolutely adorable. He is by far the best guy I've ever dated and not to sound conceited but I'm glad I've waited. He treats me the way I feel I deserve to be treated and we have a mutual respect and concern for each other. The only drawback is that I don't see him more but we discussed it and that may actually be better for the both of us since we both stay fairly busy. I still wish that we could be busy seeing each other but it makes the time we do get to spend together more special. And I think we cherish each other more than if we had the luxury of being together every day. Anyway, we're off to a great start and seeing him is an added bonus to my vacation!

Sorry for interrupting, List. Please continue...

5. FAMILY REUNIONS!
Need I say more? Seeing kin folk (and seeing a baby cousin I haven't had the pleasure of meeting yet) and eating more food than you can imagine all at the same time is pure bliss to me. I think I'm more excited to see Mom and Dad than anybody else though. I never dreamed that I would have stuck around Paris for so long so I'm still getting used to only seeing my parents every few months. Although I am blessed enough that they still pay for me to fly home whenever I can make time and I am so thankful for that. It will be a year to the day Sunday that I first came to visit Paris and now, a year later, here I am. My, how time changes things!?!

6. BROTHERS
Getting to spend time with my brothers is always a blast for me. From the time I see them, I'll be laughing. I've already been laughing with my little bro, JP this week. He's been calling me a bit more often and his latest call included the following:

JP: Why don't we talk more? You're fun to talk to.
Me: Because you're busy working and going to school all the time.
JP: Well, I usually have a break around 11:30 every night.
Me: So call me, it'll only be 10:30 here. I'm still up then.
JP: I'll have to do that.

You have no idea how much that warmed my heart y'all. And check out our conversation via the Facebook wall (begin reading at the bottom of the insert which is the last picture of me-the postings are listed in order of most recent date):

Bethany Pearce wrote at 10:19pm yesterday Ok, Mr. Business Agg. I'll take 40% and any tips you get... No more negotiations. Me no speak English. Write on My Wall - Delete

Jonathan Pearce (N.C. State) wrote at 9:51pm yesterday I'll give you 30% if you are really lucky Write on Jonathan's Wall - Delete

Bethany Pearce wrote at 9:42pm yesterday If you think I'm gonna let some crazy, hyperactive chihuahua carry my 3 karat platinum ring down the aisle, you've got another thing coming. Now that I think about it, I don't know if I'd let you carry them. :) Maybe you just better stand at the door and pass out programs-you could sell them for a small fee and make a li'l extra cash at my wedding! Ha... Matt's already said he's selling tickets to it so you guys could provide a package price. But I get a 50% cut... Write on My Wall - Delete

Jonathan Pearce (N.C. State) wrote at 4:53pm yesterday you can't just mail order a guy and marry him like that......I'm too old to carry the rings, better get a cute dog pillow so Toby can hold it. Write on Jonathan's Wall - Delete

Bethany Pearce wrote at 4:07pm yesterday P.S. I'm glad we're not getting divorced any time soon. I'll be needing a ring bearer in my wedding... :) Write on My Wall - Delete

Jonathan Pearce (N.C. State) wrote at 12:11pm yesterday Hahaha......you crazy Write on Jonathan's Wall - Delete

Bethany Pearce wrote at 11:32am yesterday Don't be blah. Suck it up champ! :) Don't forget to tell fill-in bf that he'll need to wear his best khakis and polo to the reunions because if I am going to endure everyone's gossip about my baby, I'll at least need him to look presentable. Write on My Wall - Delete

Bethany Pearce wrote at 2:22pm on July 11th, 2008 1.For the record, I have no problem that you and Joe are any kind of life partners, I just don't want to see it plastered all over FB. 2.You're right, you don't stand a chance and I haven't even seen the girl. 3. I just really want to see if you and your gf make a cute couple. So obey your elder and get on it! Write on My Wall - Delete

Jonathan Pearce (N.C. State) wrote at 2:18pm on July 11th, 2008 Me and Joe are hetero life partners and you're going to have to deal with that. He's engaged anyway, I don't stand a chance, she's a lot more beautiful than me..... Write on Jonathan's Wall - Delete

Bethany Pearce wrote at 2:15pm on July 11th, 2008 Hurry up and put up a pic of you & her so that I can quit looking at this semi-gay picture of you and Joe already Write on My Wall - Delete

Bethany Pearce wrote at 2:11pm on July 11th, 2008 Ok, what is this??? A relationship status update and I didn't know about it ahead of time??? I even stayed up with you until the wee hours of the morning and you're gonna be like this. I can't believe it. I'm crying. Sad day. Write on My Wall - Delete

See, growing up, I've not really had the best relationships with my brothers. Being a perfectionist, OCD girl and being viewed as a fanatic to them (How else do Baptists describe Pentecostals?) has alienated me from them and I think they've felt I'm just too hard core to talk to. But I really feel that he and I are beginning to restore that sibling relationship now. He's even mentioned pursuing pharmaceutical sales and us living together in Dallas after he graduates and although that thought was a bit sketchy to me at first, I think we'd have a good time together. Of course, in 6 months when he actually does graduate, he'll have changed his mind and be moving to Seattle to sell coffee or something. Anyway, I am so thankful to have brothers who know how to laugh and enjoy family company as it has provided the best post-Sunday lunch entertainment I know and I look forward to what this weekend will bring. Family reunions always bring a whole new repertoire of laughable material to the table and I can't wait!

7. FOOD
Courtesy of my father's precious family, I get to enjoy not 1 but 2, count 'em, TWO wonderful, home-cooked meals. Now, I know I've been dieting and exercising some (and last week, I think I'd lost somewhere around 30 lbs.) but family reunion weekend-I'M FREE! I refuse to deny myself the treat of eating what I want and however much of it and as detrimental as that may sound for my weight loss, I actually tend to eat less when I go into it openly. So I am VERY excited about all the good food I will be enjoying at the reunions and even moreso the meals Mama will make after we return home. She knows what I like and is SUCH a good cook. I really should take some lessons from her. And on top of all that, I'll be in Zaxby's country! Woo hoo! And I can't tell you how excited I am to get to eat a Zaxby's club or the Chicken Fingers meal with that Texas toast and cole slaw! MMM...I can taste it now! So yeah, my love affair with food continues!

8. NC
I don't know if you've gathered this from reading since you've never read my blog but I absolutely LOVE my home state. My blood runs Carolina blue and I miss Tarheel country when I'm not there. The landscape, the smells, the familiar sights-I can't wait to take them all in again and plant my feet on my home turf once again. "Nothing could be finer than to be in Carolina in the morning!" I know exactly why Gus Kahn felt that way-there's no place I'd rather be!


9. SLEEP
As selfish or lazy as it sounds, I am so ready to sleep. Per my previous post, you should understand why I'm not resting well. Yesterday I noticed that I'm only comfortable when I'm standing as sitting or laying puts pressure directly on the area and sends blinding pain to my mid-back. So the prospect of sleeping in a comfy bed-perhaps even sleeping as long as my body desires-is a HUGE point of relief for me! (Don't worry, purchasing a new one is on the top of my priority list when I return next week so there is an end in sight to all my complaining.)

10. LOVE
Ridiculous as it may sound, this trip is going to be full of love. Love from family, friends, Z and I need a little of that right now. At the risk of sounding whiny, I have felt a bit "alone" here lately, like I've poured out myself on others so much lately that I'm empty and I'm excited about the time I'll get to be poured into. I don't want a parade or crown to wear, I just want to be loved. I know there are lots of people here who do (ok, that sounded egotistical but you know what I mean) but sometimes, I just need to be reminded that I'm loved for all of me-my past, present and future included-and only people who know my past can love me in that way. I also like to feel that love and unfortunately, I am so busy so often that I don't take the time to feel that love or effectively pour it out on others. The point of this paragraph? I'm excited about LOVE!

Ok, now I seriously MUST get busy at work or I may not have a job to come back to. I guess this long post has been a while in the making. There's so much more to share but that will have to be done from Z's house this evening or the plane/car rides tomorrow. Pictures and fun stories are sure to follow!

Much love & many blessings to all of you, Mom & Dad! Can't wait to see you at 12:09pm tomorrow in Charlotte!

~B
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.
1 John 4:7-12